Journal of a New York City Psychic

Wow! I am shocked at how many awesome things are happening in succession. Yesterday when I went out I wore my cape coat which I love. But it felt like the most appropriate outfit. I felt like I should be wearing a cape! Yesterday was the conclusion of my part in making something in my local community happen. Let's just say what I did greased the wheels, and it's all out of my hands now. What I love about it is it's for the community. It affects us all, and it affects me deeply. In the past and even currently, if this issue only affected me, I would not have moved mountains as I did. I would not have spread the word. But we have had some massive wins in the community lately. And I feel grateful to be a part of this community.

For about three years, I had felt that significant change was just around the corner. I would tell my longtime assistant, “We are just about to be at the knee of the curve!” And I felt that, and I meant it. Everything got washed away. Of course, the pandemic happened, and all my friends moved away when I lived in California. Then I moved back east, where I finally solved the biggest problem in my business. My assistant and I built up recurring profit every month, and just like the American dream, I could take off work for a bit and take care of my aging parents. And then, as soon as I was about to get back to work (because the money was about to run out), I got suddenly kicked out of my entire biological family, realized I had been abused my whole life, and didn't know it and found myself homeless. After so much success, I never dreamed that this New York City Psychic would be in such dire straights!

It's been amazing reflecting on this past year, knowing that I have walked my talk in a way I never imagined I would have to do. I teach this class called how to trust your intuition in the face of fear, doubt, and uncertainty. These sudden unexpected changes caused me to navigate arguably the most uncertainty I could ever imagine. And what made my life turn around was practicing what I teach. It was tough to make it through those times, but I've been forged in fire. I'm stronger, more whole, much more relaxed, and generally healthier, having gone through all that. A considerable gift was given to me by the sudden change of all of the toxic people leaving my life in one big wave. Now there is nothing outside of myself that is holding me back! Not many people can say that. I'm proud and humbled and have a deep well of compassion for poor people struggling.

Through these significant challenges, I've seen myself in a way I've always wanted to be seen. Not realizing that I was never surrounded by people who authentically cared for me, I was constantly aching for them to see me for who I truly was. I also didn't realize that my clarity and my strength in my inherent gifts were a threat to those same people, and that's why they treated me so poorly. Their lack of strength, self-acceptance, ability to take responsibility, and lack of empathy caused them to abuse me. And this is beneficial now because I am essentially the same person; I'm just more confident in myself. And I know that when I upset people, it is not because I'm doing something wrong it is not because I'm too much, too loud, or too anything. When I upset people, it's because I trigger them, and triggers come from unhealed wounds. Wounds that can only heal when the wounded take ownership and take steps to heal. That's a process that I will practice forever. 

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